Soap opera

Spoiler alert: I am on the verge of crying. Almost made it as the role model for DSM 4/ major depressive disorder criteria. I am the living example of neurotic patient SigmundFreud hadn't dare to analyze.



A gentle reminder: I had a nice hair cut recently! see previous blog.

 I have loads to do! I think my sincere love to the musculoskeletal system is translating into this ortho umm love? (eww, I am throwing up already ). Or is it the fact I am over thinking about my little sister travel? Things in my part of the world is "unique". Call us retarded, but  we are the group. No space for a selfish individual (theoretically speaking of course). And let me put it straight: I am a big believer in the group thing that I took it to a new level.( what is that? You think I wrote that to make up for my nonsense homesickness ?)



My parents are sixty something. They are fragile. Living almost alone. I worry about them all the time. I fear my dad will had ,yet, another heart attack and the idea of mum wondering helplessly turned my life into a nightmare. I am worried that the annoying pain mother is feeling in her operated breast is a recurrence. I am terrified of losing my parents for they are life for me.* I am afraid of the day my younger siblings will become orphans. Yes I am so spoiled. Yes I am so attached to my parents. Yes they made sure each one of us know how proud they are to have us. They are life for me ( have I said that already? And yes I enjoy life and do things to my utter happiness. And no they have no say in my career choice.)

This homesickness thing wasn't the norm.  It was there in my first year in college and  after my parents develop these ailment  came back.**   ( why I remembered Zarathustra all the sudden?)

I have a presentation*** to do and an assessment to study for. I was shamelessly indulged in self pity the whole weekend, that I feel stupid and robotic right now. I need to get started. I'll take a shower, dance ( don't even ask), maybe write a post about a couple of interesting cases/stories I saw so far in ortho. Then I'll embrace ortho.

P.S. I just noted I had such crying episode while in pediatric rotation. It is funny I was considering both as my future specialty of choice. Ortho is lovely trust me. You need to know the basic and then everything will fall into place ( I guess).

* I was literally sobbing while writing that

**I stopped sobbing here

*** Oh, do I dare to say I was nicely prepared, hadn't my consultant totally changed the topic hours before my weekend started. Good thing the older topic was broad ( and interesting) and  serve me good in revising some anatomy . I thought I was the master of compression neuropathies!